Life's rough sometimes...

First let me say that i'm sorry for not posting in a week! It's not like i have been super busy just super lazy! Alot has happened since i last posted first lets start with the most recent thing.
yesterday i lost my cell phone. i put it in my back pocket and didn't realize that the pocket had a cell phone sized hole in it! so from somewhere between walking to the library from my car at icc it fell out! now anyone who has lost or had their phone stolen you know how i feel! its not the end of the world but it sucks. All my numbers that i need and all my pictures and the stupid little memory card all gone! it sucks. let me reiterate it blows! haha sorry for being random, but i'm at panera and there is a table of middle aged ladies and they are the loudest most annoying people ever! haha sorry they are just being loud and they have such annoying laughs! I wish they would read my blog! anyways i lost my phone but luckily i have a back up phone but it doesn't have any numbers so you should call or text me so i can have your number once again!
So i've been struggling lately with the fact that God has control of everything. So much i just want to be like dude i got this and do it myself. Its hard for me to realize that i cant do everything on my own. its so hard to just sit back and let god take care of things. Like my phone for instance, so much i want to just be pissed that i lost the stupid thing and just forget about it and not even worry or give it up to god. The thing thats wrong here is that i don't trust god that he will take care of it. If i just leave it up to him he'll take care of everything. I just struggle sometimes!!!!!!!
Gosh those women are annoying! i think i should go sit next to them and start laughing! the funny thing would be i'm by myself. :)
So i'm ready to go to kansas city. Life here is alright but as of lately my parents and i have been clashing heads. I want to use the house just like a hotel and obviously its not working out for them! They don't ever tell me anything about whats going on or where they are, i don't ask because i think if its important they'll let me know. so i do the same to them and i guess they get pissed about it. i know most of the time its my responsibility to check in and give them that courtesy but if i forget they could atlest call me and see whats up. i won't care i promise you wouldn't interrupt me or anything! well... its raining outside...illinois weather blows.